


the spotlight beats down

by starblessed



Category: Anastasia - Flaherty/Ahrens/McNally
Genre: Character Study, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-14
Updated: 2018-10-14
Packaged: 2019-08-02 05:29:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 627
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16298993
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/starblessed/pseuds/starblessed
Summary: Countess Lily Malevsky-Malevitch remembers being invincible.





	the spotlight beats down

**Author's Note:**

> It's been a while since I wrote any Anastasia fic, but... I just... love Lily, okay? Darn it, I love her so much.

Countess Lily Malevsky-Malevitch is a class act.

She’s been called _plenty_ of things, of course (a lot of them not half as nice, but twice as flattering). Over the years, enough reputations have passed her by that it would be easiest to think of herself in terms of what _other people_ think of _her._ Plenty of countesses would have done just that; it was the way of court life, after all. Who you were and where you came from meant everything. As long as you were somebody, you were _somebody_. And being somebody mattered to everybody.

Lily was never one of those countesses. The fact is, she knows exactly who she is — knows herself too well. She is plenty of things, not all of them decent, but if she has to apply one moniker to define herself, she chooses to be a class act.

As one of the prominent ladies in Petersburg society, she always basked in notoriety. No one noticed the daughter of a diplomat. When she married the illustrious Count Malevsky-Malevitch, though -- all of a sudden, people noticed her. Darling Lily, with her red hair and red lips, bright eyes and brighter smile. Society was its own language, and Lily grew up speaking it. She‘s a natural performer, after all. There is nothing more natural (more laborious, more artificial, more toxic) than giving the people what they want. A flashed smile, a wave and a wink, laughter bubbling like champagne in a tumbling fountain... it was all so easy. Lily enjoyed every second. Where was the harm in being a _bon vivante_ as long as you were adored for it? After awhile, she became invincible. The world was vast and tiresome, intent on waging war against itself... but she was young and beautiful. Regret was an afterthought. Scandal could not touch her (though the walking scandal known as _Count Popov_ certainly tried). She could never die.

Then the world shattered.

Now… well, now there’s no more court, and no more Russia. She is no longer an illustrious, carefree Countess; her Count is long gone, and the court that once clung to her every word has dwindled. Paris is no place for anyone to live in the past, even an old woman who has nothing else left --- it moves on at its relentless pace, leaving anyone unable to keep up behind. Lily has seen the world pass her by. She does not know how to slow it down; she can only push her aging body faster and faster, determined (desperate) to keep up.

Russia's civil war has ended, and a new dawn has risen; but for those left behind, the night's not over 'til it's over.

Where a person comes from no longer matters --- so why should who matter at all? Who are they, besides refugees? Besides relics? Besides the past, unwilling to face the present? This is what other people think of them, so why should the last true Russians think anything different? (After all, this is the way of court, the way of life... and they are the last alive to remember it.)

Lily's not satisfied with that. She _knows_ who she is.

Always entertaining, vivacious, outrageous — the life of the party. That's Countess Lily. The Dowager Empress’ devoted lady-in-waiting. That's Countess Lily. One of the last remnants of a dead empire, desperately sipping the dregs of the past to numb a dry future. _That's_ Countess Lily.

Knowing herself, she often thinks, is nine-tenths of the problem. (Too little booze, too few attractive men, and a foreign nation beneath her feet make up the other ten percent.)

No. Lily is perfectly happy being a class act... and she'll perform for as long as the curtain is still up, and the stage is still standing.


End file.
